The beginning or the end?

Foto: Katja Diedrich

46…46 years old…time for change? Probably. The songs keep coming, but the big change is the understanding that certain things are coming to the fore: A sense that the things I do have to be real – palpable. I’m getting better at what I do and am recording again, but I’m aware that the music – while it feels to me to be the most important thing – is only as important as it is! It’s part of everything and part of me – but the other parts of me – the children, the desire to work in new places and learn new things – are also there in abundance.

It’s a time to look at what you do and figure out what exactly it is that you do! What do you do well? What takes too much time? Where do you waste your efforts? As far as myy music is concerend I can identify the following:

I’m loving playing the guitar and singing, more than ever! The recordings I do at present show me that I am getting better – starting to understand my voice and my guitars – but I also have room to improve. We’re recording right now using just one pair of stereo mics and the quality of the mics is scary! This means that if I don’t hit the mark, you sense it, you hear it, you can’t avoid it. It’s a great feeling to go through this process.

At first you feel like giving up because it’s so much effort to get so far and not get the result you want. Then you go home and realise that, actually, the song sounds good at home, and that the recording is just showing you two things:

1. Where your voice struggles under the pressure of the studio

2: Where you think you sing well, but you actually don’t

It’s hard to accept, but it makes sense: In concerts I take a lot of time to make sure I can here myself well when I sing, but in the studio the sound gets absorbed by the surroundings and suddenly you get situations where you aren’t able to hear your own voice as clearly. You have to adapt, but most importantly, you have to get to work. You have to get up and rehearse those songs every day until you work instinctively with them. AND, if you chose to record in the way I do, you have to accept there may be mistakes which can be heard.

Foto: Katja Diedrich

Then there’s GREENWOOD. I think GREENWOOD deserves a whole chapter, but this band is proof that great things can begin at the age of 46. The band has a music style which forces me to change the way I write. The band is built on not my voice, but Robin’s. And Drums and Bass guitar form the fundament. As far as the recording process is concerned, we’re taking our inspiration from the sound created by Springsteen. Something Fresh, but where you can almost smell the work that was put in. The photos we had taken were, again, by Kajta Diedrich (Freiburg). She took us up a snowy mountain in December and managed to makes us look like we knew what we were doing.

Foto: Katja Diedrich

So, the music is developing into something solid, more honest, more realistic. It’s losing its ego somewhat, I would say. It’s aiming to get across not just the sound of the guitar, but the smell of the guitar, too. And that’s why it’s important to get the recording right. In a concert I can dive into the moment, connecting with myself and the audience. In the studio you have to do all the connecting yourself. You have to be yourself. I think I can do it.

It means that some older videos will have to go – they aren’t representative of what I have learned. That’s one of the reasons why I’m having a friend recreate my homepage – my internet identity – so that someone can objectively present what I do. I certainly can’t. And the second project is…. Now that would be telling! Next time!

See you!

More info at

The Return of The Holy Grail

Atkin OM Serial number 63/0401

Alister Atkin must think I’m bonkers – verging on raving lunatic. I don’t know. But I can assure him, I am neither. We met in September 2018 in Mannheim at the Guitar Summit and, being the gentleman that he is, he took time with me over a beer to answer all my questions.

I had travelled there with a second or third hand Atkin OM from the year 2001 which had fallen quite surprisingly into my care the previous month. I had been spellbound by this particular guitar ever since I met Oliver Scheidies (Singer Songwriter and guitarist from Freiburg) and watched him play it. I have played alongside Ollie for many years now and although he could make an old broom sound like a 1930s blues guitar, he’s a man who can spot a good six string at a distance, and loves to play one. If Ollie offers you one of his guitars, you have to take it seriously.

Well, in July 2018,Ollie offered me his Atkin for the THIRD TIME! I said no. I had to. It was his Atkin, and he had loved playing it. Now,, to undertand why Ollie would want to sell it, you need to know the background: The guitar was nearly 20 years old and had been played to the point where it needed quite urgent attention. In short – it had been through the mill and was worse for wear. The story goes that a young Alister Atkin brought this beauty (one of his early efforts – number 63) to Freiburg while visiting his then girlfriend. The records reveal that he swapped it for at least one AER amplifier. End of story…..Or perhaps not!

Unbeknown to Alister Atkin at some point the guitar (still in Freiburg) suffered a battering and was brought into the shop belonging to Thomas Sjenmann for repair – In other words, she was left for dead. Thomas, being the man he is, took it upon himself to bring the guitar back to life. If you look closely at the guitar, you see that some kind of neckbreak is evident, among other things. Thomas quietly went about his work and, before too long, the guitar was hanging up in his shop for sale. Enter Mr. Scheidies.

Ollie – always a man for a bargain – spotted the old OM and immediately tested it. HIs conclusion: Small body, OM size, breathtaking sound. He bought it on the spot. And so the OM of Alister Atkin found a new home and remained quite a few years with Oliver Scheidies, doing the rounds in concert halls and town allies.

In 2012 I met Ollie and over the years we began playing together. Ollie always had (and still has) a selection of fantastic instruments which he regularly exchanges for others, but his Atkin endured throughout this period. Then, in July 2018 (one year ago) the almost unthinkable happened. For the third time Ollie offered me the Atkin. I was about to turn him down (again) but this time it was for real. A friend would be picking her up that week, come what may. That was the moment I had to accept the offer and keep her in the family . I haggled with Ollie, told him he had to sell it to me, and agreed to pay him what the other guy would have paid.

Stunned, I put down the phone, wondered where to get the cash I’d just offered to pay, and wandered around a little dazed for a few days. I had been observing Alister Atkin’s guitars for a while at this point and had even begun saving for a new one – an order which would cost €3600 and take over a year to receive. And now, here I was, about to go and pick up this battered but beautiful-sounding Atkin OM.

A few days later I took the cash over and met Ollie in his flat. The Atkin was standing in the corner as usual, taking a break from being played. We drank a coffee (Ollie makes the greatest coffee) and very soon, the talk turned to the OM in the corner. Ollie was surprised that I didn’t pick it up imediately. The truth is, a certain respect for the moment and the relationship between Ollie and the guitar made it impossible. And the fact that I had the feeling I was about to have one of the Holy Grails of the guitar world in my hands.

The guitar is a mystery. The break it suffered doesn’t seem to have affected the tone. In fact, the tone is unique. Bluesy, woody, big (if needed), gentle (if required) ringing, tight, cuts through the mix like a whip crack. She’s light and compact. It’s the Atkin sound.

The new OMs from Alister are essentially the same, but in some ways different animals. More Rolls Royce with a huge engine under the hood. Pefect guitars. This early Atkin has the essentials – nothing more – and has been played to the brink of existence. As a guitar should be. My take on all of Alister’s guitars is this: They are built to be played…and played and played. I was shopping around for a pre-owned Atkin (a hard thing to find becuase nobody likes to sell them!) over the period while my OM was in repair, and was a bit shocked to see in how good condition the instruments on offer were.

So, there I am with the Atkin, and slowly I begin to realise that this baby has to find its way back to Alister. That’s when the gods of the guitar universe conspire to help. Prepared as I was to drive to Canterbury (UK) with her, to Alister’s workshop, I am extatic when I discover that Atkin guitars will be represented on a stand at the Guitar Summit in Mannhein 2018. I book my ticket and in the middle of September I drive up to meet the great man.

Alister and the team take a good look at the guitar and are surprised how great she still sounds. It’s a beautiful thing to be able to recount my part of the story to him, and he takes his time to explain that number 63 was probably constructed in his garage, back then, before he had a space in a workshop. He’s very patient while listening to my questions, but also amazingly authentic and guitar crazy. I return the next day to the exhibition, duly order a brand new Atkin Essential OOO, and leave my guitar with him and the team to take back to the workshop. Number 63 desperately needs a look at the neck, the frets and the tuners. I return home happy.

Ten months later….

Anyone who is dealing with one of the greatest guitar builders will know that patience is required. Especially in Alister’s case. The company is taking off in a serious way, and a guitar builder such as Alister Atkin faces a great challenge: How to produce more guitars without compromising on sound or quality. Alister’s workshop is small and, at the time of our meeting, they were planning to expand next door. This all takes time and effort, and whilst he’s got some of the world’s greatest players/singers on his list of Atkin owners, it’s only reasonable that he gives them priority in terms of repair jobs and custom builds. Anyone who has read the boook “Clapton’s guitar” by Allen St. John will testify to the fact that persistence is required in order to get great builders to turn their attention to your guitar.

So I knew I was going to have to settle in for a long ride when I left her with him in Mannheim that day. Days passed, weeks passed, months passed. At some point I wondered if it had all been a dream, but I nver doubted it had been the right thing to do…to leave it with him. I began to dream about her arriving, and in each dream the guitar became even more magnificent and mysterious than in the previos one. A dangerous thing, for when I finally received a mail that my package from Atkin guitars was on its way, my expectations had become dream-like fantasies of a a magic instrument which would solve all ills on planet earth.

She arrived looking quite the same..apart from the repairs to the neck, fret and tuners. Workshop dust covered some of the guitar, and she arrived in the same, cheap case I had left her in that day. A sense of anti-climax overcame me. I quietly sat her down on the sofa, upright, and went about my daily business, tidying the kitchen and checking that the house was OK before the kids arrived from school. I fetched a new pack of Elixir strings and got to work changing the strings on the guitar.

I wondered if the guitar still suited me? I had only owned her for 6 weeks before letting her go, and perhaps my imagination of how it would be to play her would conflict with reality. I finally picked her up and drove into her with a plectrum on a full G chord, then a C, and a D. I tried a full E and an A. She played with ease – the repair was good. Very good. The sound was booming but controlled. It was all still there. The fretboard looked great, the tuners were smooth, and the action was perfect. The holy grail had returned.

So many concerts had come and gone in those 10 months. Many moments when I had wished to be playing this guitar, but somehow it was meant to be this way. Who knows what would have happened if she had come back ealrier? I just trust in the guitar gods – and I trust in Alister. And I promise to give him a break now!

You can find some great videos and all the information about Atkin guitars at

Time to risk it

ON Friday we release our CD…we sing in front of friends und new faces in Schopfheim and try to put our heart and soul into what we do.

Foto: Katja Diedrich

There are a few of us out there doing just that at the moment. Our “scene” is quite a a cool place to be right now. In the last year alone I had the chance to play with some great musicians, but I also got to see a lot in concert.

Michael Morrissey, Beni and Sofia, Beuz Thiombane, Oliver Scheidies, Lyndsay Ferguson, Bella and schroeder, Tilo Wachter…. It’s great to see such great performances out there, and to learn from each and every one. Special mention here for Matthias Reinelt (Solo Enterntainer, Singer and allrounder) who got up at my brithday onto the stage und just did his stuff with such a clear sense of purpose that I wondered why I bother trying so hard sometimes to make things fizz, boom and bang the whole time. He just hit the nail on the head with his work on the stage.

And Friday? Well, On Friday our album “Alleingeburt” hits the ground running and we’re looking forward to a big party in the Cafe am Hebel in Schopfheim. A big thank you to Hannes Kumke for the sound he created and then to Katja Diedrich for the astounding pictures. We’ve got a good feeling about this one.

I think we created something quite unique – and so we’re gonna enjoy it for a short while; even if I’m already thinking about how to go deeper in the recording studio. Mr Kumke we’re gonna have some fun now! Seriously though, the last year has seen me play more guitar and sing more than I ever did before. And I got better at it. I’m starting to understand what it is I do…How to play this instrument…how to become one with the song and the words. It’s a great feeling. It’s a bit like being at the beginning of a journey and already possessing the experience of the journey ahead – but not each encounter or moment.

And the risk? Well, to live like we do… to try and stand up every day for what we do, without being arrogant or conceited, and to get out there and live. To get better. And also to be able to leave it all behind…. What?

Yep… The time has come to take a risk and go on a journey. May and June will see us packing the van and heading south. With the kids. With as much and as little of evrything as possible. We’re going to break what routine we have and look to live a little deeper for a while. Then, when we get back, it’s into the studio to capture the rewards of all the practise.

Love to all, Ben

After the recording is before the recording….

The recording for “Alleingeburt” began in December 2017… 9 months ago. Hannes, the sound engineer, had had a baby in July, and we had ours in October. It’s been a busy time. A good time. Nevertheless, things have taken their time, and what began as an idea, a wish to record songs, became a process […]

Musician? Don’t talk about it…Just be it!!

I hear us all – those of us who have decided to perform for a living – explain to audiences that we are musicians. That this is something we do for a living. Professional. The trouble is, the more I hear this, the more I have the feeling inside that something is not right. The point is, you don’t have to be a professional musician (Someone who earns money from the act of playing music) in order to be a great musician.You shouldn’t have to prove it with explanations In fact, the opposite is true: There are people working in 9 to 5 jobs all day, or farming fields from dawn to dusk, who could blow us away with their talent and feeling when they play or sing.

Up until 3 and a half years ago I had spent my life working in schools. The decision to concentrate on music was a long process – and was forced also by circumstance. I was finding myself running into the same walls whenever I had a job which demanded too much structure in my life. I had 4, 5, then 6 children to take care of, and we wanted to devote our lives to this task. So…. as time went by, I decided to settle on a way of life which put the children first.


At the same time, the songs were coming faster and faster. I was meeting people who were encouraging me to take a step. I started playing more and more, and from that point on, it was just a question of self-belief. Self-belief is not something which comes easy to me or others, and it’s something which I have to work on everyday, but I’m beginning to understand its importance. Our lack of it is the reason why we constantly have to explain to others that we are “musicians”, NO. If you’re good at what you do, then people will feel this fact. You won’t have to prove it with words. They’ll see you play and KNOW you are simply doing what comes naturally.

Another problem in today’s world is that we believe we can get to the top without effort. We seem to believe we have the god-given right to be heard, loved and successful. Wrong. I’m currently reading the biography of Bruce Springsteen. Amazing stuff. The years this guy practised, rehearsed, studied, devoted himself to the job before he finally gets a breakthough – someone who believes in him – are a lesson for us all, in all walks of life. He had to work hard on his material, work hard on his technique, learn how to reflect – learn how to improve – for many years. Such dedication from a man who was, quite obviously, at the top of the pile from the very beginning.

It’s about authenticity. Can I take my guitar in my hands, walk onto the stage, or into the corner of the pub, and be me? My life has to be reflected in the songs, even if the audience isn’t fully aware of the meaning of the song. It has to be felt. I can be liked, or disliked. My job is to confront he people with me and my story. And if I’m good, people will be interested. People will ask for more. And professional? That is a question others have to answer. For me, the music has more – means more – when the person performing is more than just a musician. Unless they are Bruce Springsteen!


To be on the verge of something very good

To be on the verge of something – Kurz davor, was zu tun   We’re in the last part of the recording and mixing process for the new album: “Alleingeburt“. It’s been a long process, and – during this process – we have learned countless things. Most of them had nothing to do with the […]

Re-Blog… A process ends a process begins

  Months pass and a process comes to an end which began with the Birth of L.   In that time, myself and Kilya decided to stop singing together, so we could concentrate on being parents…being together. We both came to the decision one day, in the weeks before the birth. We sat on the sofa […]

Our unassisted childbirth 17th Oct 2017 – Unsere Alleingeburt 17 Okt 2017 –

If my work and music reflects my life, then hopefully, by now, things are starting to fit into place. 8 years ago I was a teacher, married with two children. I look at the pictures from back then and consider myself “boring”. It’s clear when I look at the pictures that I’m just fulfilling a […]

This Year

This year I managed the following:

I delivered a baby at home, I bought 9 chickens, I lost 7 chickens to a fox, I went to London for a funeral, I appeared in over 30 concerts, I made 3 quite professional videos, I began recording my new album, I found a job, I quit a job, I found another job, I became a full-time musician and father, I joined a mens group, I left a mens group, I had a song of mine used for a fathers rights campaign, I stopped eating extra sugar, I lost a lot of weight, I started exercising, My eyes got a bit worse, I built a house for our tomatoes, I sang at events, I ran a Kindergarden, I recorded a single with a great singer, I found another singer, I saw the sun rise over the alps on many mornings, I travelled to Spain and France, I was informed that my two oldest children will be moving away, I cried, I screamed, I learned to understand things I couldn’t accept, I filed my tax returns, I worked in the local shop, I listened to music which inspired me, I presented my first live radio show, I got caught in the crossfire between two parties who were fighting, I spoke my honest opinion, I chopped wood, I changed nappies, I took my children to school, I banged my foot real bad, I changed guitar strings, I took a lot of stuff to the recycling centre, I drank coffee in a beautiful cafe…. and much more!

And then there were 6

I couldn’t write this on Monday when it happened. I don’t know if I can write it now, but my life is my music and therefore I feel obliged to write something. Anyone who knows me, knows me as Ben with all the children. On Monday I was informed, told that my two eldest (11,13) […]

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